". . . and the wife must respect her husband."

This was Paul’s final instruction in Ephesians 5. Now, of course we know that Paul didn't intend for Chapter 5 of Ephesians to end that way – because he did not write his letter in chapter and verse. BUT – it’s still the end of a paragraph. The instruction earlier in the chapter help set the home life setting so that proper instruction can then be given (and received) by the children. There’s a logical progression here. It works.

What is respect? “Esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability. The condition of being esteemed or honored. Favor or partiality. To show regard or consideration for.”

Recently I heard a successful man talk about what a man feels when he loses his job. My internal response was “Fear of not being able to pay the bills or feed his family.” But this man said, “The fear of losing the respect of his family.” I realized at that point, the depth of the value of respect men desire from the people closest to them.

It was also that statement that caused me to see how little I knew about what Paul was instructing wives to do to show honor to their husbands. The definition is different than love or submission --- there’s more to it than that. There’s a level of reverence and honor and gratefulness connected to it.

I’ve begun reading Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (I highly recommend this book for all married people and soon to be so). He says, “Wives do not need a lot of coaching on being loving. It is something God built into them, and they do it naturally. However, they do need help with respect.” Men want women who believe in them.

Men want women who believe in them. One more time: Men want women who believe in them. They want us to appreciate his desire to work and achieve.

What does that mean to you, wives? How do you communicate it? This matters much to him.

I am determined to grasp and demonstrate this at a greater level in my marriage. I truly am grateful for a man I do love, honor, enjoy, and respect. Time and again he goes above and beyond to pursue ideas, dreams and avenues to help and bless our family. He’s always thinking about the future . . . our future. And in the process, makes every day a step in that direction.