Thursday, February 25, 2010

Look at me when I’m talking to you!


As parents of small children, it seemed impossible to imagine what our 2 year old will look like, how he will act when he’s 18, what his personality will be. Instead, we enjoy every moment and just watch and experience every day . . . one at a time.

And soon enough, our toddlers are teenagers – wonderful teenagers. I have enjoyed every single day of every age of our children. And God is faithful to give wisdom for every age, every phase, every new aspect of young life.

Teenagers provide provoking conversations. They ask questions of their parents about life goals, dreams (you still have some, right mom and dad?) and the future. This all takes listening. Lots of listening. In the listening, make sure you stop long enough to also look them in the eyes. Your teens completely understand the depth of communication that can come with eye contact.

The following is from Mark Gregston’s blog (Heartlight Ministries). It’s a good reminder for all of us.

There is a vital link between the amount of time you spend listening to your teenager and their willingness to listen to you in return.

A friend told me this story. He said, “My son was upset about something and wanted to talk about it at that very moment. But he caught me in the middle of something. So I only half listened, and made no eye contact. When I was finished, I went back to talk to him … but he only half listened, and wouldn’t make eye contact. I asked why and he said ‘Why should I do that for you, when you didn’t for me.’”

The dad apologized and learned to listen to be a better listener, thereby assuring that his teen would do the same.


Look at them when they talk to you. Look at them when you are talking to them. This will make a difference. A huge difference in how the conversation goes. Every time. The eyes are the windows of the soul. Really. You’ll see more than words.

Friday, February 19, 2010

When Teenagers begin to show maturity . . .


The number one goal of a parent is to raise their children to become loving, confident, self-sufficient, sensible adults who love God, love and take care of their families, and contribute to community.

This is a quick 6 item list to help along the way from Mark Gregston of Heartlight Ministries – He gives good insight for parents.

So, what’s a parent to do when their child reaches the teen years and begins to show maturity?
Here’s what I recommend:
1) Loosen the reins, but remain watchful.
2) Continue to have a presence in their life; not one that dominates or hovers, but one that guides and limits when necessary, and sets them free to soar when appropriate.
3) Keep connected with the tools of their trade, like text messaging, cell phones, and social networking.
4) Invite their friends into your home, so you can get to know them.
5) Find some fun things you enjoy doing together.
6) And above all else, be sure to meet with them individually once a week, mostly just to listen to what’s on their heart.
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©2009 Mark Gregston Heartlight Ministries

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Kissing is Good For You!


Kissing is Good For You! But you probably already knew that.

This is for you husbands and wives! In honor of Valentine’s Day, the Yahoo home page had links to several articles about romance and I liked this one especially. Kissing is good for you . . . and here is a summary of the five reasons why.

1.) Kissing boosts immunity.
2.) Kissing helps you pick the best mate (I might add reminds you why they are)
3.) Kissing burns calories!
4.) Kissing keeps facial muscles strong.
5.) Kissing naturally relaxes you.

I have a philosophy – which I have written about before – but here it is:

A 30 second kiss EVERY DAY will enhance and improve the state of your marriage. Now I am a firm believer that some days should involve kisses that last longer than 30 seconds, but I am talking about a daily habit for married couples.

This kiss will force each of you to focus completely on the other for this half a minute. A quick peck or any form of duty kiss will not cause a change of focus on your spouse. It’s still a good thing to do, but a 30-second kiss says something different.

A serious kiss can say several things. “I love you.” “I love what this could lead to later.” Or it simply says, “No matter what else has happened today, coming home to you, seeing you again, gives me great joy and comfort.”

A serious kiss says: I choose you!

Saturday, February 13, 2010

pocket


I’d like to make you
Small enough
To carry around
In my pocket.
Then we could be together
All the time.
And you could tumble
And stretch
Between my thumb
And forefinger,
And tickle my palm
When I start making
Self-important faces
At the world.

My son gave me a book of poetry by Dick Summer for my birthday. This is one of my favorites from the collection "lovin touch III."

Enjoy.